missionmightymom

Honestly, I was never that person who feared turning thirty. I didn’t lay in bed and cry. There was no need for Prozac or Xanax. To me, it was another birthday, and I love birthdays. And the way I saw it, I was just one day older than the day before. It wasn’t like I was going to wake the morning of my birthday an entire year older than the day before. No big deal.

But what I didn’t expect, maybe because I didn’t give it much thought, was how much I would enjoy being thirty…and now thirty-something. I guess it’s not that I love being thirty-something, rather I love the lessons the past thirty-(almost two) years has taught me. I am way better at being thirty than I was at being twenty…by far.

Lessons Learned

• This to shall pass. I live by this. It is so honest. Its a reminder in good times to not take even a breath for granted and its a reminder in the bad times that there is light at the end of the tunnel. There is always light at the end of the tunnel.
• Only I control my happiness.  of course my husband makes me happy. And my girls bring me more joy than I could have ever imagined. But I cannot allow myself to put that sort of responsibility on their tiny little shoulders. I must choose happiness. And by-golly, I do!
• All relationships serve a purpose. But all relationships are not neccesarily meant to last. I’ve spent many hours torn to pieces over relationships that I thought would last a lifetime. Now I know when to let go. And it is suddenly so much easier to breathe.
• Don’t be so quick to judge. Judge? Who me? Uh-hem. Guilty as charged. In the past I have been quick to count someone out for various reasons, selfish reasons. And now I’m wondering what/who all I missed out on. I’m still learning that some relationships takes more time to reveal themselves. This new revelation has born some very exciting friendships.
• My time is valuable. I wife. I mom (times two). I work. And there are only so many hours in the day. Which means I haven’t a second to waste. I now carefully choose how to spend my time and who to spend my time with. I have gotten over the fear of saying ‘No’. I no longer allow guilt to make decisions for me. And like I said before, Whew, so much easier to breathe.
• Working out is about more than appearances. It’s about getting the most out of your body. It’s about having the ability to play with your kids and dance with your husband. It’s a health issue. Not a confidence issue. (Although that may be an added bonus).
• Forgive. The only person suffering from any grudges I hold is me.
• I am THAT  Momma-and proud of it. You know the one. The one constantly shoving pictures of her kids in your face, talking in detail about snotty noses and poos in the potty. I actually said once… aloud, meaning that there are witnesses, that I would never be that Mom. Well guess what, it happens. Even to those of us with the best intentions.
• Pray and then Trust. I m a lifelong worry-wart. I have spent my entire life attempting to control everyone and everything of meaning to me, in a desperate attempt to keep at all ‘safe.’ It is only by the grace of God that my husband stuck by me while I tried to ‘protect’ him from everything for the first 13 years of our relationship. Now I pray. And God hears. There is nothing more that I can do.
• I can’t be everything to everyone. I’ve learned to cut myself some slack. To prioritize. To not feel like a failure for asking for help.
• I will never-ever look like Cindy Crawford. Dangit! I am still unsure how/where to apply eyeliner and concealer. My fingers and toes are always a wreck. And most days I forget to shave. But surprise! I still have friends. I still have a man that thinks I’m beautiful. And I have a three year old who is proud to look just like her Momma.
• Money buys “Things”. I don’t drive a brand new car, nor do I live in the nicest home in the nicest neighborhood. But guess what. I am happy. Perfectly and blissfully happy. Which leads me to one conclusion. Money does not equal happiness. Would I be happier if I carried a designer bag (full of spilled milk and Cheerio crumbs)? Would I smile more if my engagement ring were twice the size? Absolutely not. With age has come the ability to appreciate all that I have and to care less what the ‘Jones” think.

So fear not twenty-somethings. Before you make plans to call in on the ‘Big Day’ to allow time to mourn the passing of your youth, know this. Turning thirty isn’t half as bad as you think. It’s actually not bad at all. I highly recommend it!

And because I have the wisdom of a thirty-something (Ha), I am well aware of the curve balls and dark days still ahead. But life is a journey full of lessons. I am enjoying the ride and taking notes. And I wouldn’t be twenty again if you paid me in diapers.