Renewing the Spirit When Your Hanging on by a Thread

Confession: Last week (the entire week) was one BIG Momma fail.

I don’t know if it was lack of sleep, because for some unknown reason my toddler decided that waking up at 5am in party-mode for several consecutive days seemed like fun, or because I’ve yet to have a second to recover from the holiday chaos because I had to dive immediately in to birthday party chaos, or because my husband was working… ALOT. Whatever the reason, last week did not look good on me. When I saw my reflection in my babes’ eyes…Ugh! I’m so ashamed.

I met up with one of my nearest and dearest on Saturday. I asked how she was. “I’m good.” She asked how I was. “Hanging on by a thread!” Pause… Then she proceeded. “Okay, I typically just say everything is going great. But now that you’ve admitted it, I’m drowning too.”

Mommas, why do we do this to ourselves?! To each other? When we paint the picture of perfection and deny the sometimes struggles of parenting, we are then at least partially responsible for creating another’s Mommy Guilt. Sometimes hearing an honest answer from another Momma about how she hides in an empty bathtub during hide-and-seek, desperate for a moment to herself, or how she shuts herself  in the closet to eat her chocolate because for “once” she doesn’t want to share, can be just the reminder that we need to exhale. Last week, I needed a reminder to exhale.

Then, on Friday, with guilt quickly replacing my sanity, this little gem entered my inbox.

We all need time for ourselves and time to be with our friends in order to be joyful. Lord, help me to balance my day and renew my spirit.

And I scheduled a much needed, long overdue dinner date with a girlfriend. Someone I knew would get it. Don’t get me wrong, I adore my husband. He is without a doubt, my very best friend. And although there is much that he does get, this, he simply doesn’t. I can’t blame him, and I don’t (okay, sometimes I do). I know that my husband doesn’t want to hear me complain about things that he doesn’t understand. He will. He does. But it’s good for our marriage if I direct it elsewhere on occasion.  

So, I enjoyed a nice dinner with a best friend, filled with, “Aahh! Me too!”  And that’s so nice to hear. We laughed about our parallels and exchanged advice. We discussed inappropriate things that only best friends discuss. We actually tasted our food. It’s the little things.  We played shuffleboard. We made friends with girls that reminded us of ourselves all those years ago- new to the big city, eyes bright.

And our spirits were renewed.

 

Sometimes The Mommahood is overwhelming. When our patience is dwindling and we are ‘hanging on by a thread’, we just need a break. We deserve a break. A walk, a hot bath, a piece of chocolate in the corner of our dark closet…or a dinner with a Soul Sister, to adjust the kink and remove the ‘tude.

I woke up the next morning  a better Mom, a better wife. And that will always be my ultimate goal; to be better…for them. And in order for that to happen, I must also take care of me.

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Comments
One Response to “Renewing the Spirit When Your Hanging on by a Thread”
  1. Heather says:

    So true…by not being authentic with others (saying “help” when we are drowning)…not only do we not allow anyone else to throw us a lifeline…but I think we also make others think they should be doing better… Being honest about our struggles is empowering for us and our friends! 🙂 Thanks for great post!

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